HG: An Illustrator's Perspective
Hyperemesis Gravidarum takes so much from those caught in its grasp. One thing HG can’t take from me is my drive to create. As I was caught up in the worst parts of the suffering, feeling isolated and alone, it occurred to me to try to draw what I was experiencing. These doodles became a lifeline as well as a much needed creative outlet.
HG Moves In
This being my fifth pregnancy, I fully expected HG to visit. I half hoped it would, considering what happened last time when it didn’t come. However, when HG came barging in, I knew it was there to stay, and my heart began to race. I was still hesitant and still nervous to accept what lie ahead, yet I didn’t necessarily want to kick it out either. I wanted this baby. At the same time, I was already so tired. I had three other little ones to care for and the morning sickness was quickly ramping up. Couldn’t that be enough?
HG said no. If I wanted this baby, it was time to be “all in.”
Okay, fine.
HG Comes with Sidekicks
Having experienced one mild and two moderate cases of hyperemesis gravidarum in pregnancies past, I knew HG wouldn’t come alone. HG is so much more than just vomiting all the time. There is a whole army of other side effects to make room for.
Unwelcome Extras
Oh the side effects. The symptoms of hyperemesis gravidarum represented here certainly are not a comprehensive list. There’s also malnutrition, possible organ failure, racing heart, low blood pressure, ketosis, constipation, relationship loss, pregnancy loss, the list goes on. Mothers suffering with HG can have any possible cocktail of some or all of these side effects. The side effects come from the condition itself, as well as from medications and treatments available to remedy symptoms.
Scrambling for Relief
As symptoms settle in, you begin scrambling for relief. There are many, many remedies to try. And trust me, you try just about all of them!
Eventually, you come to find that searching for relief becomes a game of “which would you rather?” Would you rather be vomiting, or a zombie? Would you rather be vomiting, or an anxious mess? Would you rather be vomiting, or constipated? Would you rather be on no medicine, or one medicine to stop vomiting and five others to alleviate the symptoms of the antiemetic medicine?
Always Something
Dissolvable Zofran is near impossible to throw up. But as you’ll notice in the illustration, the nausea is unaffected. It just stops the vomiting. And the trade off isn’t much of an improvement…
Rolling into the Second Trimester Like…
People who think they know a thing or two about being sick in early pregnancy will get your hopes up that it’ll all be over by week 12. I tip my hat to those fortunate souls who have such luck! HG, however, tends to be more of a long term companion.
Sometimes it feels like you are doing something wrong when you reach the end of the first trimester and you are still suffering so much. Everyone around you is waiting with baited breath for you to bounce back and start feeling great again. Unfortunately, that’s not how it works for all HG sufferers. It gets daunting when you are in the early stages of a pregnancy and you dare to look at the long road ahead. You have to take each day one at a time. This is an endurance game.
At All Times.
Sometimes it feels like when one symptom lets up, another increases in intensity.
Sometimes HG Feels Like…
Hyperemesis gravidarum can be so very painful. Sometimes it feels like being lassoed around the middle with barbed wire. It squeezes out the enjoyment you so dearly want to feel for your pregnancy. It’s hard to feel excitement and to glow when you’re trying not to scream in pain.
HG Angels
As lonely as the HG experience can feel, you’re never alone. I sincerely believe these angel HG babies are never far from their mamas. I believe they are aware of what we’re going through and that they are grateful for this sacrifice. There are many different things that help us get through HG pregnancies, but the strongest of these is love. Maybe that sounds cliche, but it’s true.
Through thick and through thin, your mother I’ll be.
When mommies get sick, and sometimes they do, how do things change for me and for you?
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When mommies get sick, and sometimes they do, how do things change for me and for you? 〰️
“When Mommies Get Sick”
written and illustrated by Jayne Ann Osborne
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