5 Ways to Bring More Sunshine into Your Child's Day
“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know dear, how much I love you.”
I recently came across a Reel on Instagram by Amanda Ferguson (@MrsAmandaFerguson). In it, she said, “Dear woman, be around women whose presence feels like sunshine. These are the types of women who light a fire in you that cannot be dimmed.”
That phrase has stuck with me all week. “…women whose presence feels like sunshine.”
Is my presence in my home a source of sunshine?
Am I a light for my husband and my children'?
“These are the types of women who light a fire in you that cannot be dimmed.”
As I pray daily for each of my children, my hope is that they will go out into the world filled with so much light and love that they can’t help but shine it and share it with others around them. I want their presence to be infectiously pure and radiant and kind. I want them to be filled with a fire that cannot be dimmed - not by bullies, not by thoughtless comments, not by negativity or disappointment or any other form of discouragement that may cross their path.
So, if I’m going to live my life on purpose, what can I be doing to be that kind of woman for my family? What can I do to increase the amount of sunshine I bring into our home? What can I do to light a fire within my family that cannot be dimmed?
Here are five simple strategies I’ve honed in on for now. As you read on, keep a curious mind open to receive answers and ideas of your own. I’d love to hear what you come up with in the comments!
Five Simple Strategies to Become the Sunshine in Your Home
Smile More.
Smiling is one thing that the “fake it till you make it” strategy really seems to work well with. By taking a moment to look myself in the eyes in the mirror and smile, a softening happens. I begin to develop a sense of support and compassion for the woman in the mirror. Once the smile has taken root internally, I can go about the rest of my day with a genuine smile to share with everyone else around me.
Practice Gratitude.
By beginning, filling and ending each day with moments of gratitude, it becomes easier to notice things to be grateful for. I love beginning my day in prayer, thanking God for specific blessings I’ve noticed or that I look forward to that day. Doing so works as a sort of springboard for the rest of the day. As I notice little things that spark happiness or joy, I try to call it out to Him. Now and then, my kids will notice the pause and ask what I’m doing. By taking a minute to explain, they’ll often smile too, seeing something as simple as a well timed butterfly sighting with new eyes.
Focus on the Present.
This is a really hard one for me. If focusing on the present is a struggle for you too, here is something a therapist taught me. Pause and isolate your senses. Name 5 different smells, then 5 different physical sensations, then 5 different sounds, and so on. That magical number 5 is just enough of a challenge that you truly have to focus in on the here and now to be able to name 5 whole, separate sounds, smells, etc.
By being anchored in the present, you become an anchor yourself. Heaven only knows the winds and the waves that rock our family members’ ships throughout the day. If I can be an anchor, I can be a safe harbor in our home.
Encourage Kindness.
Kindness doesn’t always come naturally in every situation, every day. That’s okay. That’s human. By sitting and brainstorming ways to cultivate kindness towards ourselves and others, we’re building neural pathways in the minds of our family members that will change hearts and lives. Encouraging kindness can be as simple as reminiscing on kindnesses you’ve received. Sharing such experiences with your children builds momentum and helps their minds begin growing ideas on how to spread kindness themselves.
Celebrate the Little Things
They say positive feedback is the “work smarter, not harder” approach to effecting change. By calling out the little victories you notice, you’re giving your child a boost of confidence that will infuse positivity, courage and resilience.
“Wow, buddy! You’ve been keeping the toilet seat a lot cleaner this week! I’m proud of you.”
“Did you notice how nicely you asked your sister to get out of your bedroom? I sure did and I’m so thankful for that kind tone of voice you used!”
“You read 15 minutes every day this week without me having to tell you! Do you have any idea how cool that is? High five!”
I want my presence in my home to feel like sunshine. I want my kids to be able to warm their hearts and bask in it. I want my influence in their lives to light a fire in them that no outside force can extinguish.
I’m not a perfect mother by any stretch of the imagination, but I do believe God chose me to be the mother of my kids on purpose. His constant, guiding influence is real and I know He led me to Amanda’s post for a reason. I can’t wait to see what comes from increasing my capacity to be a woman whose presence feels like sunshine.
What are you going to do this week to bring sunshine?
